Friday, March 20, 2009

One-Liner Immortal Devourer of Souls Friday

Provocative, to say the least. Is being deliberately provocative to this degree sufficient cause for revocation of one's business license? I say it is.

Why do birds suddenly appear every time you are near, Ziggy? They long to subject you to litigation and emotional anguish. And they want your lunch.

Once you've hit both fluid in your lungs and shaded nose, you're pretty much over the peak of recoverability anyway.

A related thought: If Ziggy dies in your backyard, all you can really do is throw him by his legs over the fence for the neighbors to take care of.

"Identity crisis? Hmm. . . you're too short for a murderous schizophrenic, but you'd be a great secret agent!"

"Actually, your generic change of name last week to 'National Bank' was pretty telling." Next week it'll be "The Money Place" and they'll only hand out Chuck-E-Cheese Tokens.

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