Thursday, April 24, 2008

Update: Ziggy Not Necessarily Going To Jail

It seems that Ziggy has managed to escape the IRS cesspool and is now working on his other, less-pressing debts. In retrospect, I think that I neglected one important fact yesterday: Ziggy doesn't seem to make any income on which to pay taxes. He had his "asking for directions" look on while considering those foreboding doors - a look that we've seen before.

So - time to balance your budget, Ziggy. In an effort to distract our attention from that mind-bending mess of calendar confusion coming out of your mouth, let's start by making a list of the ways that you're already saving money:

* Feeding pet parrot, dog and cat diet of peanut butter sandwiches, thus eliminating shopping to one grocery list.

* Not buying sorely-needed antidepressants, reducing medical expenses.

* Buying from underpriced pervert grocers.

* Limiting furniture to that needed on the current day (you might not know it, but peripherally-located furniture costs an arm and a leg for comic strip characters. The Get Fuzzy crew alone is shelling out $25k a year.

Looks like you're doing good, Ziggy. Get a part-time job and pay off those bills, then we'll start working on the antidepressant situation. Oh, how we miss the days before the darkness:

Come back, Ziggy.

No comments: